Yearning and the “inner chambers” of consciousness

This week I had one of the women in my classes ask me about the difference between expression and action. She wondered whether “work” and “expression” need to be the same, and whether it is possible for them to be the same.

The duality between “work” or “action”, and “expression” or a manifestation where something of depth in our self is invested, is the foundational framework of our way of living in these times. We “work” for a living and mostly divorce this work from any passion or expression from within. Indeed, workplaces these days demand a divorce of this nature. Some of us then seek spirituality or other “hobbies’ as “self-expression” to fulfil the Yearning within us to manifest some of our passion and feelings.

We may all have to acquiesce to the duality between work and passion at times in our lives. I have also done this for periods in my life. I have experienced this duality as brutal and suffocating.

In the dance tradition I teach, this duality is the duality between the king and his court, and the inner chambers of the constellation of women who hold the wisdom about sensation, timelessness, mystery and inquiry. When we separate work from passion, we act like the king who has ignored his inner chambers.

The source of this practice is rooted in the multi-dimensional approach to consciousness in ancient dance. Consciousness is invoked as a king’s court. The inner aspects of this court are the chambers of the women (the feminine in its broadest sense) including manifestations of the Great Goddess, the wife or consort, the old woman who has wisdom about timelessness, and the “messenger” or the clarifier. This constellation of the feminine is the “pura” or the body in its material sense of fluids and organs, as well as the immaterial sense of feelings and sensations.

The “king” is the external projection, the world of the court which includes the ministers, generals and other external facing functionaries. The “king’s” cosmos is the expression of action in the external world, the cosmos of structures, thoughts, and words. For an organic functioning of the court, the king relies on messages from the inner chambers. He relies on the messenger transmitting these messages with clarity and wisdom.

The messenger is not simply someone who repeats a given communication. Rather they engage in a dialogue with the dancer/Apsara to clarify the communication. This is a remarkable practice where the messenger uses the Rasa of Hasya or laughter to tease the dancer, even as she is in the throes of her “suffering”. This teasing is done with deep affection and with a view to grounding the expressions of Yearning in the everyday reality rather than in a magnification of self and ego through martyrdom. For example, the messenger may compare the dancer’s Yearning to their own Yearning for sweet snacks. Or when the dancer speaks of her boxes of jewellery which she is ready to gift to the messenger, they may speak of their own boxes of lentils which nourish and feed them. The effect of this interaction is to humanise the Yearning as an embodied and everyday sensation that we all carry within us.

The messenger then asks the dancer to translate the Yearning into words in the form of a letter which they can take to the “king”. The writing is body-led—the dancer manifests the Yearning through her dancing body and then brings it into words. Thus, the word emerges from the dancing body. This is the letter or message that is taken to the “king”.

There is deep wisdom in this invocation of consciousness. Action in the world uniformed by the tenderness, vulnerability and trembling of Yearning is disconnected action. It is possible for us to transform the deepest of our sensations into words, so long as we inquire into them through the language before word, which is dance. The nature of exploration is inquiry, it is not dogma or as set template. The messenger consciousness in us can help us clarify and source our words in the deeper expression of the dancing body. This message is conducive to the “king” for it asks him to unite with the dancer as she longs for his company. It is not a conflictual message but one that is tender and loving.

Unity of expression and action is “wholeness” in a dance philosophy. Unity is not external to us, nor is it a hobby practice. It is the nature of daily action. When we are asked to sign up to frameworks that demand a divorce between our passion and our work, it is not a benign ask. We relinquish our humanity in this divorce. And with that we lose the fire, heat or passion that is our presence and expression in this lifetime.

We are not asked to sleepwalk through our lives by setting aside the wondrous wisdom of our inner chambers. Rather, when the “king” comes to the dancer, there is beauty and joy in the union. And even when he leaves, the scent of the beauty lingers and pervades in our expressive actions in the world. Thus, we create a scented life for us and a scented world for all life around us.

Photo: Lorna Sim